I have had an extremely anxiety filled week. I met my potentially future supervisor for my counseling internship (it was kind of like an interview), saw my first client (I'm pretty sure she wanted to hug me), set up my first couples therapy session, had a wretched group therapy session via my group dynamics class, and anticipate counseling and supervision today and tomorrow.
Anxiety creeps up into your stomach, and it sits there, hot and knotty. I'm convinced it controls my heart beat and boosts my metabolism. What I'm thinking about it what it communicates to me. Clearly it says that I don't feel at ease, but I also think it makes me question myself. Am I good enough, likable enough, courageous enough, competent enough? It makes me aware that I listen to the voice of pride telling me that I must be in control, that I can't trust God. It highlights my brokenness and the areas of my life in need of sanctification.
I hate how it feels, but I think I just may be thankful for it.
Aw, Brook. I love ya. And I can see, through you, how God uses the hard things of life to bring about His glory. Thanks for the blog post.
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